Well I made it. Got home on the 24th at around 2 am and spent the next several days with family doing the christmas thing and catching up on some zzzz's. Indoor heating is amazing, you have no idea how nice it feels to walk around the house in only 1 pair of socks...sometimes I don't even wear a sweater! I'm really enjoying relaxing and taking it easy for now. The Ultimate Black Belt Test is almost over and I've accomplished a lot. Did I succeed in every goal? Nope, but I learned so much about myself in the process and grew so much as a martial artist and a human being that the goals themselves have become secondary. I still plan to blog often, I'll be in China and need to keep everyone posted on what I'm up to. So for the folks out there who are regular readers, I'll still try to keep it entertaining. Thanks to everyone who's been there for me offering me support this year, I appreciate it more than I can say.

Yesterday was the first day of our break and it felt soooo good to sleep in and bum around all day. It's funny though because today we leave on the train to Beijing and we're packing and cleaning but what I really want to do is practice! I guess it's really become a part of my daily routine and having more than one day off at a time seems really strange. I'm so excited to hang out in a heated house with my family and eat delicious home-cooked food! I don't look forward to the long train and plane rides but once we get home I'm going to be really stoked.

Not much else to say....in a few hours we'll be on our way home.

I don't have a whole lot to say this week. It's almost break time and I'm winding down. Still training hard but mentally most of my focus is on the break. I'm so looking forward to some serious rest but I'm also determined not to lose momentum. I've gotten pretty used to demanding practice every day and I don't want to get lazy. That'd just make it even harder when we start up again. So I have a few things I'll be working on over the next month and a half to keep me limber and on top of my game, qi gong, stretching, and of course training with my silent river kung fu family.

Wow It's hard to believe that it's December already. Our break starts in 16 days and it seems like time has really flown by these past few months. We finished Xuen Gong Chuan 1,2, and 3 and now we're taking some time to practice and polish them before the break. I'm glad because even though I know the forms, I still feel like they need a lot of work. I'm still getting used to the style differences from my training at home and constantly need to remind myself to make the movements bigger. The Xuan Gong system is a long fist system and pretty different from what I've trained in the past. For those of you at home it's more similar to Lao Gar or Mu long koon. We also practice as a group a lot and need to work on staying together and in proper lines before it'll look decent.

I'm looking forward to resting and especially to coming home but it also seems really strange that it's break time already. We're making good progress so we definitely have time for a break but I'm nervous about what the training will be like when we get back. I'm going to keep stretching and stuff while I'm home but I still hope that Sifu will ease us back into training and not try to kill us right off the bat.

UBBT goals are going alright. I'm looking forward to getting in some sparring rounds while I'm home so get ready everyone!

What the UBBT Has Done for Me

When Master Brinker asked us if we wanted to participate as student members in the UBBT with him I had already set some personal goals and been working hard on them. My own goals were completely up to me but with the UBBT I had to choose from a selection off of the website. The nice thing about that was that the goals were already measurable, something I struggled with on my own goals. By measurable I mean they were worded so that I could easily keep track of my progress and I would know for sure when I was finished. For example 1000 acts of kindness is measurable, you just have to keep track of the numbers, whereas if I had written that I wanted to be more kind, it would be hard to know whether I had succeeded or not.

I admit that since coming to China to train full time again, I've found the UBBT less useful than I believe most of my teammates have but during my time home in Canada it was invaluable. I know that without the goals I chose for myself I would have never tried Brazilian Jiu Jitsu which was a lot of fun and very informative. I also tried Muay Thai which I thought I would like a lot more than I did. Both were mind broadening experiences and reinforced for me why I love kung fu so much.

While I was home I was training hard 6 days a week and totally focused on my martial arts training the entire time. Knowing that I was moving to China in the fall I wanted to spend as much time with my family and friends as possible, without the UBBT pushing me I'm sure I would have let my training fall to the back burner and focused more on social obligations. Now I can look back and I feel like I accomplished both intense training and spending quality time with those I care about both of which were extremely important to me. I have never been so driven and self-motivated as I was during the 6ish months before my return to Wudang. This was an important experience not only to achieve the goals that I had set but also to prove that I really have what it takes to push myself to do what is important to me in spite of social and societal pressures.

I also learned about how to train with injuries, how to avoid them, and how to take care of them when they happen. When you have a huge pile of goals hanging over your head you can't just take a week or 2 off if you get hurt, you have to figure out a way to work around it. I sprained my ankle so I couldn't do any run/walk/bike stuff so I did extra push ups, sit ups, etc while I let my ankle heal. I also learned that when you push your body so very hard you have to take really good care of it, I got regular massages (something I've never really made a priority before), ate well and often, and tried to avoid anything that would be another stressor in my daily routine. These lessons are really going to help me while I'm here training in China. I had a completely frozen up shoulder/neck last week and I've had to continue training without making it any worse. One armed push ups, slower punches, no handstands, massages, applying this AWESOME herbal ointment and it's slowly getting better and better.

Probably the most important thing I got out of the UBBT is that setting a goal and giving it my all is WAY more important than whether or not I succeed in achieving said goal. Some goals I blew out of the water and others I'm definitely not going to succeed at but they were all really valuable experiences that taught me about myself and what I'm made of. I have so much more confidence now to try my best at anything in life because I know that the journey really is more important than the destination.

I'm really glad that I chose to participate in the UBBT and really grateful to Sifu Brinker for asking me. Definitely a life changing experience.

I'm very cold.

It snowed here this week for 2 days or so and it's been very cold the whole week. We had an epic snowball fight 2 days ago with almost every student in the school participating, it was a lot of fun. Other than that I've been spending all my time either training or snuggling my hot water bottle under a blanket desperately trying to stay warm. Compared to a Canadian winter this is nothing but living in big buildings with no heat and missing windows in every hallway makes it way more challenging. Luckily a short term student who was leaving sold me a brand new down sleeping bag for super cheap a few weeks ago so at least I'm warm when I'm sleeping at night. I also bring it with me to meditation and it helps a lot. We meditate in a cold, dark room for an hour and a half or so almost every night and it gets pretty chilly when you're sitting perfectly still.

On the plus side my class finished learning Xuan Gong Chuan II this week and started on Xuan Gong Chuan III already. By the time we go on our Christmas break we'll be almost half done our set curriculum for this year which puts us ahead of schedule...sweet! Who knows what awesome extra stuff we'll get to do! I'm really looking forward to learning the broadsword form which we'll probably start around March or April. It is definitely one of the coolest broadsord forms I've seen in my short lifetime.

So I'm just training, trying to keep warm, looking forward to coming home in about a month and digging in to some western food and enjoying the indoor heating!

We had our first class on Taoism and wushu theory this week. I wasn't really sure what to expect but it was really interesting. Shifu did an excellent job of explaining something which is basically impossible to explain and in english too. He said that even people that understand Chinese very well have a difficult time with the concepts so he will repeat the ideas over and over so we can understand them.

There is a text in Taoism which describes the attainment of peace and stillness. He explained a bit of the beginning to us:

In the beginning there is formlessness, no name, "nature", "the way". Lao tzu said that he chose a name to call it 'tao' and as soon as it was named there was shape to it, a circle. Because this circle contains everything, it has every extreme with perfect balance within it. 1 becomes 2. Yin and yang. Within yin and yang there is every part of heaven, earth, and humans. 2 becomes 3. These three together can create anything. 3 becomes everything (wan wu).

He also explained the idea of "He" to us. As far as I can tell He means unity and balance. Yin and yang have he because they cannot be separated. He said that this would come up many more times in future classes.

We touched briefly on the word for experience. Basically Lao tzu wrote that understanding can only be acheived through experience (repetition of techniques to relate it to kung fu) not through learning. An interesting and familiar concept. I look forward to the next class.

Well that's a brief synopsis of what was covered. I have explained it as well as I can at this point. Hopefully more clarity will come as I understand more and more.

Our Shifu is back from his tournament in Beijing. Even before he left he was really busy with the preparations and training the students who would be participating in it so he didn't have as much time to train our traditional class as much as he would have liked. Well that's all changed now and he taught our class very rigorously today. Even though it was really difficult and he laid the smack down on us, I had a great day! It was more what I imagined the program would be like and if it continues I know we will improve incredibly fast.

Our performance on wednesday was really nerve wracking. I know I've mentioned it before but each Wednesday we perform our forms for Shifu as a group. Well this time since he'd been away there was a lot of pressure to do everything properly and make him happy. I was very nervous and I messed up a lot on our group performances but on my individual form I think I did fairly well.

Anyways, I'm glad he's back.

So our performance on Monday went alright. I thought there would be a big live audience but it was mostly just filmed for TV. It was funny because as we were doing our tai chi form I could hear the announcer talking about all the foreigners and which countries we were all from in Chinese. My mandarin is getting a lot better. I still have a ton of room for improvement but I'm starting to understand more and more. The pronunciation is the hardest part. Well after that we did get our western lunch, I had french fries and a chocolate sundae, no big deal in Canada but here it was the most exciting part of the day. I was really happy to get back to Wudangshan though after spending time in a big city again.

I notice more and more construction here. Some things are a lot different from when we came here last year and there are new buildings with massive cranes and such. There was a TV crew here at the school for a few days 2 weeks or so ago too. It seems this little town and Wudang kung fu are becoming more and more popular. I have a feeling that it's headed in the same direction as Shaolin kung fu. Soon enough it'll be really difficult to learn traditional kung fu here, it'll all be performance stuff and modern wushu. I'm really grateful to be here right now because another 5 or 10 years could really change the way kung fu is taught here, I know our Sifu sees what's coming. That is a big reason why he decided to have this 3 or 5 year traditional program, he knows that if our style is to continue it's tradition it will have to leave China. It seems if there's any money to be made from anything in this world, it will be changed, streamlined, and commercialized. It's pretty sad but at least I'm playing a part in preserving this tradition. Hopefully someday I'll be able to pass it on to others too.

It's been a while since I blogged, I couldn't get onto blogger this week until today. The chinese firewall grows stronger ..dum dum dum....

We are doing a public performance of our tai chi 28 form in Shiyan (the nearest big city) tomorrow so we've been practicing that a lot. It's pretty tricky because we all have to go exactly the same speed and stay in perfect lines. So we've been doing it over and over and over in preparation for that. Some of the more advanced chinese students will be performing too. I'm excited mostly because I hope we get to go out for lunch afterwards and eat some western food! Yeah.

We also have a performance on wednesday up on the mountain. Still not sure what we're supposed to be performing because these things are generally really disorganized but we'll see how it goes. I will post at the end of our week to let everyone know how it goes.

Wish me luck!

It's getting to be harder and harder to blog. I've been using proxy sites to get through the chinese firewall to sites like blogger and facebook but now even those don't always work. Today I had to try 3 times just to get on this site. The UBBT website is completely inaccessable at this point. There's so many little things like this about living in China that can be really frustrating at times. Luckily this time we have internet in our room so I can keep trying. Last time we were here we had to use the internet cafe and if we wouldn't get on to our site, it was just too bad. We'd have to try again another day. On the plus side we found some hot chocolate mix here! It's not gourmet or anything but Mel and I both love hot chocolate so much that going without is a horrifying thought.

Training this week was pretty challenging. My body is going through a lot of changes and with the change, comes pain. I feel like my muscles are getting softer and more relaxed so I notice more the places where I am stuck. Like my tendons and joints. Tuesday I was really tired and I had shooting pains in my legs and a really sore right knee. It was a struggle to get through the last day of the week. Yesterday after class Mel and I went to get massages and though it was painful (and still is for that matter) I think it was a good idea. There is a group of blind men here that give really awesome acupressure massages. I'm pretty sure that because they're blind they have greater tactile sensation which is probably why they give such great massages. I'm really glad I went. I've wanted to try it for a while and I definitely needed some help with my body this week. Hopefully tomorrow I'll be back in top form.

Warning: If menstruation freaks you out, don't read this

I thought I'd write a post about something that's been on my mind a lot lately, menses.

Being a menstruating woman here is really different. Sifu told me that we need to take care not to overtrain during the first few days of our menses but it's kind of awkward because people notice that you're not doing as much as you normally do. Naturally they ask you if something is wrong, if you're sick, if everything is ok. I don't really want to discuss my cycle with the entire school but then you have to make up some other excuse "oh I'm just really tired today" and I prefer to tell the truth. I usually train as normally as I feel is appropriate and end up saying something vague, trying to change the subject. I think I'll eventually just have to get over it and the guys here will just know all about my periods. Awesome.

There are no tampons here either. We brought about $100 worth with us and when they are gone, we will have to go to the nearest big city to buy more. It's pretty annoying to have to make a big trip just for that but I can't imagine trying to do the training that we do while wearing a pad. I did bring a diva cup with me (www.divacup.com)but I haven't been able to figure out how to use it properly so until then, it's tampons for me.

Sifu told us that we're not supposed to drink cold drinks during our menses because it cools our blood too much and causes more cramps and can also make it last longer. I decided to give it a try and have only been drinking warm or hot beverages. It's really made a difference! I only had cramps the first day and they were quite mild. When I think back to all the times I pigged out on ice cream when I had my period it's kind of funny. Why are we sometimes so drawn to the worst thing for us? I wonder how many menstruating women are eating ice cream right now.

The book I'm reading right now is called Sex, Time, and Power and it discusses a lot about evolution and women's sexuality. The author claims that the reason homo sapiens were able to tell the passage of time so very long ago is due to women's menstrual cycles and they way they coincide with the cycles of the moon. The combination of an internal and external event of 29.5 days in length eventually got through our thick skulls and we were able to see the past and the future as well as the present. Humans are the only species with such a capacity for forsight and the only one with females possesing such a dramatic menses (a few other animals menstruate but none with the severity and timing of a human female). Well if you find the topic interesting, I recommend reading the book. It's very informative.

At home it's a lot easier to ignore my periods but while I'm in Wudang and training hard, it's a lot more in my face. I have to admit that in a way I'm enjoying being more in touch with my cycle. My sister and I are sharing a room and after less than 2 months our cycles are already synchronizing. I think another 2 months should do the trick. Then for a few days every month all the guys here will have to watch out! haha. I also read that the cause of PMS is a drop in estrogen and progesterone right before menses. This means that for a short while, women have more testosterone circulating than any other sex hormones. Basically we become more aggressive and difficult, the way men are all the time. ha! Of course I'm speaking in generalizations here, not everyone fits these kind of stereotypes. I just like learning about the physiology of peoples behaviors.

That's all for now. Hopefully people were able to set aside any squeamishness about this topic. I also hope that I've inspired some to learn more about thier bodies and how they work. Pretty cool stuff.

Tai chi is so awesome.

Last night we practiced our tai chi form together and Sifu told us to focus on our dan tien and try to move very slowly but without stopping. We also did standing meditation afterwards. It was a great practice, I could really feel something. It's hard to desribe accurately but there was a sort of fullness in my dan tien (lower abdomen) and a feeling of tingling and a weird creakyness in my hands and arms. Sifu says not to focus on trying to feel any particular sensations but there are times when they're so strong that you can't not notice. The reason he says not to try to feel anything is that is because many people try so hard to feel what they're 'supposed' to that they create something in thier minds when the feeling actually comes from your body. That's supposedly why we train our bodies so hard, so that they become relaxed and strong, a clear channel for chi to flow through. It's pretty great to see it happening in my own body, I still have a long way to go but the progress is encouraging.

He also corrected me on a part of the form that's been kind of awkward and I couldn't figure out why. It feels a lot better now and even though he made me do it over and over and gave me heck in front of everyone I was able to stay calm and focused instead of feeling angry. I'm not sure why but Sifu can really make me feel embarrassed and angry when he chastises me harshly or gives me a knock on the head in class. I know that he wouldn't do that if he didn't care about helping me and that he does it purposefully but I've had a difficult time not having an emotional response in the moment. I think last night is a sign that I'm making progress in that regard too. It also made it easier to correct my mistake because I could focus on what I was doing instead of having my mind clouded with emotions. Cool.

I actually had a really challenging week of hard training and also frustration with certain people that I have no choice but to spend a LOT of time with. It was really draining and by Tuesday/Wednesday I was pretty exhausted mentally and emotionally. Thursday being the day off helped but last nights' class was what really helped me get over all that and replenish some of the energy I'd lost during the week.

Status Update

Training here has been pretty intense but I do feel like I'm getting used to the demands being placed on my body. I still feel really tired sometimes and fall into bed exhausted at night, I still get sore muscles and strange mystery pains, and I still feel discouraged when I can't do something but I can see the progress I've made so far and it pushes me to keep trying my best.

The other day we were practicing stances and I know that I've improved a lot but it seemed like all of the teachers were pushing me to go lower, punch faster, take bigger steps, etc and I was getting really frustrated. I was wondering why they were being so picky when I've already gotten better. It made me start to think about the way I train at home, have I just been pushing myself to reach a certain level of skill and then just staying there instead of continually striving for more? It really gave me something to chew on. I don't think I always did that but I do believe that in some cases I did. Here the teachers push us to always go harder, better, faster, stronger (like a Daft Punk song!) and I'm having to adjust my style accordingly. It's interesting.

We started learning a new form; Xuen Gong Chuan 1. I only know about 4 moves but it's really cool. Up to now we've only been practicing taiji and the basic form; Ji Ben Chuan. I already knew these forms but I wasn't very good at them so I've just been working on making them better but I was starting to get tired of doing just those forms over and over again. I was really excited to start learning something new and I really like Xuen Gong Chuan a lot, it reminds me of some of the hung gar forms I learned at home. I still have lots of stuff to work on with the other 2 forms too but now I can mix it up a bit more. sweet.

My Ubbt requirements are all over the place. The things that are a part of our daily training here like running and sit-ups, I'm way ahead on. The other stuff like grappling and such, I've made no progress on at all. I was hoping that I'd be able to train in that stuff outside of class but I pretty much just eat and sleep when I'm not training and I really don't have the gumption to ask someone to spar with me after a 10 hour training day. Maybe once I adjust more I can work on that stuff. We also found out that our month break starts Dec 20 so I can try to finish some of that stuff while I'm back in Canada. I'm hoping that others will be playing catch up too so we can help each other out. I'm really looking forward to coming home for our break.

Today is our day off and I'm psyched to just sit around, watch a movie, and slack off. YESSSSS!

So I'm almost through the second week of the program and I have to say that it's been waaaay better. My body is still stiff and sore but it's been greatly reduced. We do a ton of stretching which you would think would make it hurt less but when you do splits 8 times a day or so it only makes you more sore, at least at first. It is pretty exciting to see improvements so soon. The running is a lot easier already (I can keep up with the group now) and I think because of that my calves are getting stronger and consequently my jumps are getting higher. I still suck at jumping but there is hope for the future. It's crazy how high some people here can jump, especially the teenage chinese kids! I swear they could jump right over my head. I'm also practicing handstands and I can do a one handed one on the right hand. I'll take a picture soon and post it here. Once I can hold it for long enough for someone to get a good shot. haha.

Overall things are going a-ok. Mel and I are settling into being roommates and into the routine of daily training.

That's all for now, I'm going to get a friend to massage my hip for me.

It's only our second training day for the traditional program and I'm totally wiped.

We ran for 50 min instead of 1/2 hour this morning (the longest I've ever run by the way) and by breakfast time I was fully exhausted.

I feel a bit better after an afternoon nap and meditation but I am constantly going back and forth between feelings of excitement and utter discouragement (with the latter being much more common at this point).

When I'm not actually training I can see the bigger picture and I know that I'm going to improve so much, when I am in the midst of physical and mental exhaustion however, it's a different story.

Hopefully I'll feel better soon.

On the plus side I had a really weird dream with a beautiful knitted tunic in it this afternoon. My first knitting dream!

Yesterday was the official start of our traditional kung fu program. We started off with a meeting to discuss the details and last night we had a big celebration dinner with the whole school. Shifu also gave us 3 days off! It was a really awesome surprise. Sometimes he can be really generous, when he's not kicking your ass. haha.

So Mel and I are relaxing and resting our already sore bodies until then. I'm enjoying it a lot but I'm also really looking forward to getting started.

Our daily schedule will be as follows:
5am-wake up
5:10- run
5:40-stretch
6-qigong and tai chi
7:30-breakfast
8:30-morning training
12-lunch
Break (nap time)
3:30-meditation
6-dinner
7-9-evening training
10:30-lights out

Every saturday at 5pm we are also having a taoist philosophy, kung fu theory, etc class. It sounds like it'll be really interesting. Shifu said that if we want one he would also organize a chinese language class for us once a week or so which would probably be wednesday afternoon after our performance day. I guess we'll also be taking about 3 days per month for just meditation and cleansing practices with certain qigong exercises and herbs. I can't wait to blog about that!

I'm Baaaack!

Back in China.

I haven't written for a while because this website is blocked in China and I had to get around that and also get internet access in my room here.

Beijing was ok. We ended up having to stay for 2 more days than planned becasue we couldn't get train tickets until then. It was nice to slack off for a few extra days and get over the jet lag before hard-core training again. Mel and I both had 2 heavy suitcases each and I was soooo grateful that some friends came to meet us in Beijing and they helped us carry our junk. We brought a lot of stuff!

We've been in Wudang for about a week now and it's been really intense! It's really hot and muggy so even if you aren't training, you're hot and sticky all the time. On top of that our training has been pretty tough. I'm literally dripping sweat in every class. We do basics like kicks, stances, jumps, running, push-ups, the usual suspects, then we practice forms for about an hour. Same as before when I was here except that now the traditional class (3 or 5 year program) gets to do extra stuff on top of that like drilling forms, lots of jumping, burpees, really low stances, squats....a bunch of really hard stuff. I'm really glad we came a few weeks early, it's going to be difficult enough as it is.

Mel and I have our own room with a bathroom so we don't have to share with a bunch of smelly dudes. I think that's about it for special treatment though, Sifu is definitely not going to take it easy on us!

Whew....Ok so last night Mel and I had a little going away party and invited a bunch of people to come out. There was a really nice turnout but I felt like I was able to spend some time with everyone. It was a really great night overall. A few of my friends got teary eyed when saying good bye and it made me feel a little sad. I've kind of been avoiding thinking about everyone I'll be leaving behind but it was right there in my face last night. Now I'm feeling a bit blue, I know I'm really going to miss everyone. I'm really lucky in that most of the people in my life are amazing and special. That's what makes this stuff so difficult. I'm really dreading saying good bye to my parents! I know it's going to be the hardest one of all and I'm probably going to cry like a baby. I feel sad not only for myself but there is also some guilt and sadness mixed in for moving so far away from them.

"Hey Mom and Dad, how about you support me in pretty much every way imaginable (short of carrying me around) while I go off to the other side of the world and follow my dream while leaving you here to fend for yourselves"...yeah I feel like a jerk.

China...I leave in 3 days and I'm excited, sad, nervous, happy, guilty, and a million other emotions all bundled up together.

What Kung Fu Has Done For Me

This is a very brief excerpt of some thoughts I've had on the subject:

-Kung Fu has given me the confidence to try new things, take risks, and stand up for what I believe in.

-Kung Fu has brought more purpose and meaning to my life.

-Kung Fu has provided me with healthy goals and the tools I need to achieve them.

-Kung Fu is always there for me. Even If I neglect it for a while it is always waiting for me when I come back to it. A comfort and a Joy.

-Kung fu has turned my body into something fit and healthy that provides me with fun and opportunities. It has turned brought steadiness and perceptiveness to my mind, and turned my heart into a playfully seeking flame.

-Kung fu inspires me. When I feel inspired I can bring this to others.

-Kung fu has given me a second family comprised of teachers, students, and training partners. We work together to become better people.

-Kung fu makes a bad day good and a good day even better.

-Kung fu wakes me up when I am sleepwalking through life.

-Kung fu provides me with the peace of mind to deal with life's joys and sorrows and to stay centered throughout.

It's getting harder and harder to say good bye to everyone.

I am not someone who likes to talk about my feelings. I don't do the whole showing people I care thing. So now I'm really trying to open up and let the people in my life know that I care about them. It's really hard. So many times I can't find the words. I'm not even sure exactly what most of the people in my life mean to me.

The book I'm reading right now is helping me to deal with it though. Thich Nhat Hahn, The art of Power. He speaks about being fully present with those you love and really being mindful of the time you spend together. That way when one of you is gone, you won't feel any regret for not expressing your love to them. So thinking about that helps me know that I can show my loved ones how I feel

Endings and Beginnings

So I leave Edmonton in 21 days and it's really starting to hit me. I'm finishing up all my unfinished business, making sure to spend time with the people I care about, getting rid of any stuff that isn't important,slowly packing things away, and getting ready for a whole new kind of life. It feels a little bit like I'm preparing to die, like I've been given 21 days to live and now I'm trying to squeeze it all in. I'm not feeling sad, just different, and it's made me think a lot about life and death lately. I realize that although I'm not afraid of dying, I have a lot to do before I'd feel ready for that. I have much to accomplish and many people to help before my time here is done. That's why I'm so grateful for the UBBT and for Sifu Brinker, without them pushing me, it'd take way longer to get these things done. The more goals I reach, the closer all the other ones appear. It's pretty cool.

28 days

So vacation was nice. Too short, but nice. Now I'm finding it a little bit difficult to get back into the groove. I've just been doing to bare minimum for my requirements since I got back. I'm not really falling behind but I'm certainly not gaining and I'm not very excited about it either. I think I just need a really tough class to push me and get me pumped up again. I'm hoping BJJ class on Tuesday will fit the bill. I'd say Muay Thai too but I'm too chicken because it tends to be really intense no matter what.

I did have a really relaxing time and I'm glad that I got to spend more time with my family. I've been thinking a lot lately about how much I'm going to miss them when I leave. It makes me feel sad so I try not to dwell on it but I am aware that it's inevitable, I'm going to get sad sometimes. I hope that having skype will make it a little less painful and I'm relieved that we'll be coming back in February for a visit. Until we leave my plan is just to cherish every moment we have.

Vacation!!!

I leave for a short vacation the day after tomorrow. This will be the first family vacation I've gone on since I was a teenager I think. I'm SO excited! I'll continue to train while I'm away but I admit I'm excited to let some of the bruises fade and not get thrown or squished for a few days. I plan to keep up with my push-ups and sit-ups, miles, sparring, forms, and acts of kindness. I'd also like to spend some time on my tai chi form, it needs work.

Yay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Guess what else? The place we're staying at has a HOT TUB......

Honor

Around the time I started this blog I wrote a post about keeping promises to myself. I mentioned that I'd heard that every time you break a promise to yourself, you lose trust in yourself. I'd decided to rebuild that trust by purposely making and keeping promises to myself. Well it's been over a year since then and I notice a big difference in the way I act and feel.

I want people to know that if I say I will do something, I'll do it. I have proven to myself and others that I can be relied on to keep my word. The UBBT has helped me with this by forcing me to make a lot of sacrifices in order to do what I set out to do. This means a lot to me. I am much more honest and I approach things with more depth and seriousness than I did previously. I can no longer casually agree to something and then flake out later on. That would be dishonorable. Maybe it is an old fashioned concept but I think that I have regained some honor. I mean, who really has, or cares about, honor anymore? Not many people ever think about it. I do though and it's something that becomes more and more important to me every day.

On a side note, I want to thank Sifu Brinker for helping me put things in perspective last week. You are one of the most honorable people I have ever met.

Dealing with stress

On Thursday I had a really intense 2 hour BJJ class. I basically got beat down the whole time, which is what happens pretty much every time I go to that class, but it's not usually such a long class. Well after that I was too tired and discouraged to do a Muay Thai class. I was dissapointed in myself though. Then when I went home I added up all my hours and I'm just half done my BJJ requirements and a quarter on the Muay Thai. Well all of that piled on top of the stress of getting ready for a 5 year trip and I had a bit of a meltdown. I've been overwhelmed at more than one point on this journey before but this was really discouraging. I realized that I still have a ridiculous amount of work ahead of me and only about 6 weeks to do it all in. It seems impossible.

First, I talked to my mom about it and she gave me some wise words and loving encouragement. Then I called Sifu Brinker and scheduled a meeting with him. We talked about where I was with my goals and what I had already achieved. He brought up the progress I'd made since Mel and I came back from China and reminded me that without all these overwhelming goals, I would probably never have gotten this far in my training. As usual, he's right.

Well, I feel a lot better now. It's still a stressful situation but I've put it in perspective. I'm still going to try really hard reach my goals but I know that whether I do or not, I'll have done my best and improved a lot.

Wow. It's less than 2 months now until I leave for China. I still have a lot to do. I'm getting really excited but I'm also realizing how far behind I am on certain things. There's a lot of preparation that still needs to be done, not to mention all my student UBBT requirements.

Lately I've been feeling really frustrated with my requirements. BJJ and Muay Thai are a lot of fun but they are taking up most of my training time. I feel like my kung fu is falling by the wayside. I'm only around halfway done my BJJ requirement and even father behind on the Muay Thai so I really need to focus on that stuff if I'm to have any chance at all to succeed in my goals. I do have kung fu related goals but except for sparring they don't require a partner or teacher so I'm on track with those. I find that the requirements that I need a partner for are the hardest to manage. I have a hard time asking others to help me with stuff like this I guess. That's why I'm so glad Sifu Prince suggested our wednesday night sparring sessions. Besides that, they're a lot of fun.

I keep telling myself that I'll be doing kung fu full time for the next five years and to just be patient but I admit that I'm feeling a bit sorry for myself over the whole thing. I just really love kung fu and when I don't have time to practice I really miss it. It's like an old friend that never lets you down and is always there for you when you need it, even if you neglect it for a while.

On a side note Muay thai class on Thursday was insane! We did a circuit with about 20 stations and each station was a minute of whatever the activity was and then a minute of skipping rope with a 15 second break in between. I hate skipping and by the end it was actually a relief to just skip rope for a minute. I've never thrown up from exercise before but I was pretty close at the end of that class. So even though it's not kung fu it is a really good workout.

1000 Acts of Kindness

A few days ago I decided to go back and add up all my acts of kindness. Turns out I'm almost done my requirement! Crazyness. In some ways this requirement has been really easy, I like doing nice things for the people I care about, I can still do them if I'm injured, and they don't take up much time. In other ways it has been quite challenging, it takes some of the naturalness out of the acts and I feel sometimes like taking "credit" for things like this is contrary to the point. It has been interesting to think about. At first I had a hard time deciding what a "real" act of kindness is. Should I not count things that I would normally do? Should they be for strangers only? I ended up counting things that are not part of my usual daily routine and are for anyone, including my family and friends.

There are a few things I've learned from this. Acts of kindness benefit the giver as well as the receiver. I feel really good about myself when I make an effort to help someone else. People really appreciate it. I can't count how many people have thanked me profusely for the small things that I've done for them. Usually they seem surprised that anyone even took notice of them and they also seem to think that I'm a really great person. It doesn't change their minds to tell them that I am required to do things like this, they are still surprised that I would choose them over anyone else to show kindness to. I am realizing how little we normally go out of our way for someone else. It seems like most people spend a lot of time looking out for number one and not taking much time to think of others.

I hope that when this requirement is completed I can continue to do acts of kindness and know that I am doing it from my heart and not because I feel that I have to. I've developed a taste for kindness. And like a taste for blood, it can only be sated with one thing.....

Injury #2

So I had a good training week....up until wednesday night. During sparring I somehow sprained my ankle. I'm not sure exactly how it happened but Sifu prince was doing a takedown on me and I think I just landed on my foot funny and twisted it. Well it hurt a bit but the by the time I got home I was MAD! I was really frustrated because I don't have time for injuries right now, every day I need to be training hard and I can't afford to take days off. The next morning it was really stiff and sore. I had to take the day off of work AND jiu jitsu. By Friday I had it a little more in perspective, I decided to do the outline for the class I'm teaching at this years boot camp and catch up on some boring paperwork that I haven't had time for. Now it seems to be healing really quickly so I'm happy about that and I managed to participate in classes all day today with very little problem. I also got caught up on my push ups over the past few days so that's good. A setback like this can be frustrating but it really made me appreciate how lucky I am. There are others who are just as busy as I am that have much more severe problems, I should feel compassion for them, not sorry for myself.

Test of Character

UBBT. Ultimate Black Belt Test.

What can I say, it is exactly what it sounds like. A true test of character. There are many days where I wonder what ever posessed me to take this on. I am working full time, training in 2, soon to be 3 different martial arts, and trying to organize several different projects. I'm moving to China in August so I have less time to complete a lot of my requirements and preparations for that to deal with too.

On the other hand I've progressed in leaps and bounds. Combined with my previous trip to China, I've progressed more in the past few months than I have in the past few years! I would never have done a lot of the training I'm doing now if I didn't have the test to motivate me. So I'm really glad that I agreed to this even though some days I question my sanity! I think I'll look back on this period of my life as defining the person I'm becoming. And I like that person.

:)

I love Kung Fu!!!!!

If only I could spend about 5 years just training in kung fu....Oh wait, I'm doing it! Dreams really do come true!

Winning and Losing

My requirements are really all over the place right now. The Tiger Challenge went really well and I'm very happy with my performance overall. I failed at acheiving my goal though which was to place in the top 50% in each division. So now I'm in a weird state of mind. I succeeded and failed at the same time. These goals that I've set are definitely challenging, especially since I've decided to go back to China in August. There are days where I get overwhelmed and discouraged and other days where I'm on top of the world. I've also failed at meditating 15 minutes every single day. I've missed a lot of days but yet I keep going, keep trying. I've usually don't commit myself to such lofty goals but I'm so glad that I have because it's completely changed the way I see my world. Despite that fact that I know I won't succeed at everything I've chosen to do, I'm still making progress in leaps and bounds. I've changed the way I live my life and I make kung fu one of my top priorities. I always have a reason to train so I always find the time.

Even though I haven't achieved some of my goals, I'm really happy. I wish that I'd always known what I know now about success. It's about the journey, not the destination. If you don't try, you'll never succeed. And my new personal favorite: It's not whether you win or lose, it's how you play the game. These are all things that people say (and hear) all the time but I never really understood until now. I hope I can pass on what I've learned to other people so that they can feel what it's like to give it your all and not hold anything back.

It may seem like I've failed at certain things but I feel like a winner. I know now that to do your absolute best is to win, no matter what the end result is. The only way you can lose is by not trying.

thanks

I read this really awesome quote once that I wanted to put in this post. I can't find it in my book now though so I'll do my best to paraphrase. Basically, it said that once you make a solid commitment to something in your mind, things start to fall into place. Doors open and opportunities present themselves. It is not enough to say it and yet have doubts inside. You have to be 100% committed. I've experienced this a lot with kung fu. I am constantly discovering new levels of commitment that at one time I would have thought impossible and each time I do, I receive all the tools that I need. Almost magically, it is made easier and more simple than it would have been if I'd been holding back.

Well that's the gist of it. If I manage to find the quote I'll include it later. It's much more eloquent than I am.

On a side note the tournament was today and everything went really well. I performed to my very best and I'm pleased with my success. I managed to scrape up a trophy for grand champion which is proof that lots of hard work really does pay off. Thanks to everyone who supported me. I'd write more but I'm on cloud nine right now and I really just want to sit outside and enjoy the sunset.

Training at a higher level

This cold weather is making it a bit tricky to train outside. I can bundle up but when the grass is all wet, it gets a bit slippery. I've been practicing the sword form that I've made for our tournament a lot. There's one move in particular that I've had to work on over and over again. I do a flying spinning crescent kick and then I have to land and continue to spin, spiraling myself down into a tiny open X stance and extending my sword arm out to the side, almost touching the ground with the tip. It's pretty hard to balance when doing the spin at the end. For a while I always had to put my hand down to keep from falling on my butt. Well I've been practicing it like crazy and experimenting with different footwear and I've managed to get it down. It's a really cool move and I can't wait to pull it off in the tournament.

I participated in a demo at the tri-leisure centre on saturday. It went really well, everyone did a great job. I'm really glad that I agreed to it because I think it was great practice for the tournament. I wanted to see how nervous I would get and if it would mess me up. I did alright, making only one tiny mistake, and I managed to stay calm enough to actually enjoy myself. Now I'm looking forward to the tournament again. Not just to getting it over with, but also just because I think it'll be a lot of fun.

UBBT stuff is going ok. I'm falling behind on sparring again but after the tournament, I'll have more time to spend on it so I should be able to catch up. BJJ is going well. I'm getting in about 3 or 4 hours a week now so I'm making progress. My teacher is actually really good. He's straightforward and practical, qualities that I appreciate, and he treats me the same as any of the guys. It was a bit intimidating to train as one of only 2 women in my class but now I'm feeling a lot more comfortable there.

Master Brinker was talking about commitment in the brown belt class last night and it really made me think. He was talking about making kung fu a priority and having to sacrifice certain things to do that. I started thinking about the things that I've sacrificed and will continue to sacrifice. Then I started thinking about all the black belts in our school and how many sacrifices we've all made collectively. I bet it's a lot. Then I went even bigger and thought about everyone in the world who's ever made sacrifices to practice kung fu. I'm sure that some people have even sacrificed their lives. Looking at it that way certainly makes me realize how easy I've got it. So I don't get to see my friends and family as much as I'd like, I still have the freedom to train as much as I want.

Next week I'll post a bit more about commitment.

Stay the course

Jiu jitsu gives me a sore neck! All that lying down and pushing yourself up onto your shoulders is really hard on the neck. I have a massage booked for tomorrow before work and I'm really looking forward to it. I hope it helps. I know that after I get used to it and the muscles get stronger, it'll be much better but in the meantime I need some relief. I wonder if anyone else is experiencing this.

On a positive note my cousin Jena is a physiotherapist. We did an experiment last week. I did the splits as far as I could (after warming up of course) and then she asked me what muscles felt tight in that position. She did some acupuncture on those areas to relax the muscles and then I tried it again. What a difference! I reduced the space between myself and the floor by about half. I decided that I'd go and see her for future sessions to relax some of the other areas that have tightness. I'm interested to see what improvements we can make. Maybe I can get her to work on my neck too.

Things are going well for my preparation for the tournament in May. My practice schedule is regular and I'm seeing steady improvements in both forms and grappling. All I have to do now is stay the course and I should be able to have some success at the tournament. In contrast to previous years, I am actually looking forward to this one. I've managed to overcome some of the performance anxiety so that I can actually enjoy myself now. It's a lot more fun!

Practice staying calm

Jiu Jitsu this week was cool. I've gotten more into the class. We're starting to learn some really cool stuff that is pretty exciting. We learned something called a helicopter armbar that was really fun. It looks so complicated but it's actually easier once you start practicing it. Now that I get to participate in class with everyone else as a fellow student, I'm enjoying it more. I'm learning more too I think.

I've been trying to focus on getting ready for the tournament in May so I'm practicing my forms a lot and just squeezing in as much grappling and sparring as I can. It's not that far away anymore though. I was hoping I'd be further along by now. Well, I'll jsut have to keep practicing and do my best. In China we had a demostration day every wednesday where we performed our forms for the instructor one by one. It was really nerve wracking but Im glad that we did it now because I'm hoping I won't be as nervous at the tournament. Our instructor there said that the reason we did that every week was to practice staying calm in stressful situations. It works too. Week by week it became easier to get through the class and not get really nervous.

New Perspectives

I'm all better. I took a few extra days off on pretty much everyones advice and I think I made the right decision. I'm back to doing push-ups and I'm not feeling any pain at all. Now I can start playing catch up with that.

I started training in Brazilian Jiu Jitsu this week in order to get my grappling hours done in time for China. I'm still going to have to practice outside of class but at least now I'll have an arsenal of things I can work on. In some ways the class was really different from kung fu and in other ways it's the same. A lot of the basics are similar to ours. We learned how to get up safely after being taken down and I realized Master Brinker taught us that in class already. The more I learn the more I realize what a great instructor he is. Being in China and taking BJJ has really made me appreciate Silent River and Master Brinker. I'm so grateful that our training has been so well rounded over the years. I really enjoy learning a new style so far but I don't think I'll ever fall in love with it the way I've fallen in love with kung fu. I find that every time I learn something new that's really cool, the thing that excites me the most is taking it back and trying it out in our class or showing it to everyone to see what they think. I hope that I continue to learn some neat things with BJJ but I really only want to round out my kung fu training, not replace it.

Last night Master Brinker gave us an inspiring little talk about our progress. I was balking a bit at having to buy an expensive jiu jitsu gi that I'm only going to use for 4 months but he mentioned that if we thought we didn't have the money to train at what we wanted, our priorities were messed up. I know that he probably didn't mean to direct that at me but it was exactly what I needed to hear. I've decided that in order to make up for the cost of the gi I'm going to stop buying lunch every day and more diligently make my own at home. I'm sure it'll be healthier and cheaper in the long run anyway.

Last night was inspiring for another reason. Hearing about everyones trip to Alabama and how they felt about helping people and associating with high level martial artists was amazing. I can tell that it made a really big impression on them. They were both humbled and proud(of our teams hard work). I really see that they've had a powerful experience that will probably change their lives for the better. I'm proud of you guys!

It was bound to happen eventually

I know that when training as hard as I've been, eventually some kind of injury will pop up. Mine is a strained pectoral muscle on the right side. It's not that painful, unless I do push-ups. I imagine that I injured it by doing push-ups every day. I don't remember a particular incident, it's just been steadily getting worse for about 2 weeks now. Well I took a day off push-ups and I'm still taking it easy by doing less reps more often. I try to position my arms so that they're doing all the work instead of my chest. I'm not sure what else I can do. I know that I need to give it time to heal but I don't want to get too far behind on my push-ups either.

So I guess I'll just play it by ear and take it easy in the meantime. Any tips from anyone would be greatly appreciated. Should I take more time off?

Struck Down Again

I got a cold this week. The second time I've gotten sick since I've been home. I decided this is not a good sign and I'm taking measures to fix the problem. Perchance my immune system is down from travelling or training so I'm taking some herbs to help bring it back to normal. In the meantime I accomplished very little this week. Did the bare minimum I had to in order to not fall behind but I certainly didn't make much progress. Except on one thing. The form I'm creating for our tournament in May is coming along very well. Added a couple of wicked new moves this week and polished what was there. It's really starting to feel good. I was a bit worried that it would end up looking the same as the sword form I learned in Wudang just with the moves rearranged BUT that is not the case. I don't even know where the inspiration for some of this stuff is coming from! The collective unconscious perhaps. Who knows. At any rate it's very exciting. I've never created my own form before and I didn't realize how much fun it is.

So I'm happy with my the new developments and I'm no longer sick. Life is good.

Yay me

So at the risk of seeming arrogant I'm posting a link to an article with me and my sister in it.

http://ezine.kungfumagazine.com

Click on the article Women of Wudang. I'm pleased with the way it turned out.

Wow. I can't believe I'm in an article for Kung Fu Magazine! I never imagined anything like this would ever happen to me. Haha. So maybe I'm bragging a bit but I'm just really excited.

Other than that all is well. I'm feeling good. Making progress on my goals and attracting all sorts of positivity my way.

My First Living Hero: Vandana Shiva

Why I love Vandana Shiva:

A few years ago I went to see Vandana Shiva speak at the university. The lecture was called The Seed and the Spinning Wheel. She spoke about the genetic engineering of lifeforms and how dangerous this new technology was. She went into great detail explaining how biodiversity works and how our ecology depends on it. She also shared several stories about industrial agriculture versus small scale, family farming methods, water shortages caused by irresponsible practices, corporations patenting life forms, and the cultural impact of these acts on local peoples. The lecture left a huge impression in my mind and I decided to learn more about this intelligent, articulate, and caring woman.

Vandana Shiva is a quantum physicist, environmentalist, author, and womens rights activist. She is my hero because she cares about our world and about women in third world countries and because she provides a powerful example of what one woman can accomplish. Her foundation Navdanya does important work in promoting sovereignty of natural resources, bio-diversity and organics, and empowerment of women and children.

There is so much important work that Vandana Shiva does, I have neither the space nor the fortitude to include it all here. For more info please check out the links below.

"The primary threat to nature and people today comes from centralising and monopolising power and control. Not until diversity is made the logic of production will there be a chance for sustainability, justice and peace. Cultivating and conserving diversity is no luxury in our times: it is a survival imperative."
-Vandana Shiva

http://www.rightlivelihood.org/v-shiva.html
http://www.vandanashiva.org
http://www.navdanya.org
http://www.ecoworld.com/Home/Articles2

Going crazy

Wow. It's been a busy week and there's no end in sight. I'm really training hard when I can fit it in. It's not the same as being in China though, there's just not as much time here.

I realized that if I want to finish the 1000 rounds of sparring that I agreed to do, I'm going to have to do it all before I go back to China. Which means that I need to do about 40 rounds per week until then. Aaaahhhh! Ok. It's going to be ok. I'm ahead on some of my goals and behind on others including sparring. I figure that I might just be able to do it though as long as I have no life whatsoever over the next 6 months. I'm attending morning classes 2x per week, Friday night classes, and I'm going to attend as many San Shou(sparring class) nights as I can. On top of that are all the charitable projects I need to work on, preparing for the tournament in May, required reading, and other random stuff. So I'm feeling a bit overwhelmed right now.

I just need to stay calm and take it one step at a time. breathe. I can do this. Oddly enough, the only time I don't feel the pressure is when I'm actually training. Which works out well. To escape the stress I can train. Which brings me closer to achieving my goals. Which also lowers the stress.

Oh, Canada

So I'm back in Canada.

It feels really weird to be back actually. In some ways it's so nice to be breathing clean air, enjoying peace and quiet, spending time with loved ones, and resting. On the other hand I feel very out of place sometimes. It feels like China has changed me in some imperceptible way and that I no longer "jive" with Canada the way I used to. Reverse culture shock is all it is I guess. A few people have mentioned similar experiences they had after returning home from both China and other trips. The other night we went out for a nice family dinner and I felt really strange inside the restaurant. It was so clean and tasteful, there was so much expensive food, and I really felt like I didn't belong. I'm sure it'll just take time to get readjusted.

I've been home for 4 days already but am just getting over the jet-lag now. I even got a bit of a flu for a couple days but I've managed to recover quickly. However my training has really suffered. In fact with traveling, jet-lag, and the flu, I've hardly done any push-ups in the past week. I was ahead on sit-ups so I'm probably alright there but I've only done about 3 miles since returning home on Thursday. I've definitely got some catching up to do.

I do feel really good physically though. Now that I'm healthy and rested I feel strong again. Like I can do anything. I'm going to have to see if I've lost anything since leaving Wudang.

I'm coming home!

Back in Shanghai. I can't believe it's been 4 months since I was here last. It seems so strange to be here I can't imagine how it's going to feel to be back home!

I didn't want to leave Wudang at all but now that I have, I really can't wait to get home. Partly because It's really hard to fit in time for training while in transit. Mostly though, I'll admit I just can't wait to see my family and friends again. I know I can make up some push ups and sit ups so I'm not too worried about it. I finished a lot of my goals while I was in Wudang. Not UBBT goals but ones that I had set previously. 250 reps of tai chi- done, 20 hours on closing the distance- done, reps of kung fu forms- done. I'm making pretty good progress on the miles and stuff too. The things I'm behind on are sparring and grappling. I'll have to train extra hard at those when I get back to make up for it.

All in all though, I'm feeling really positive. I've improved a lot already and I'm excited to see what I look like in a years time. I think everyone will be wicked awesome and I can't wait to check you all out soon!

SORE

I am so sore!!!!

I haven't been this sore in about 2 months. After our 3 days off for Chinese new year we trained for 8 days straight, the last day being today. I thought I was getting really fit but just those extra 2 days this week pretty much killed me. I'm completely exhausted and sore from the waist down. I woke up with intense pain in my legs for the past 3 nights and had a hard time falling asleep. So I've decided to take today and tomorrow off for push ups and stuff and make it up later. On the plus side I'm ahead of the game on some of my other UBBT requirements so I think it'll work out ok in the end.

Enough with complaining. We're leaving Wudang in 4 days and though I'm sad to leave it'll be really nice to see my mom and dad again. I really miss all my friends and family. I certainly don't want to go back to work. I don't miss struggling to find time to squeeze training in between work and other obligations.....oh well. gotta make money I guess.

New Years Push-ups

I rang in the Chinese new year with 1000 push-ups.

Actually all my teammates back home rang in the western new year the same way but by the time I'd read about the plan I'd already missed it. So I decided that since I was in China anyways, I'd just do it on Chinese new year instead.

It kinda sucked that I didn't get to do it with everyone else but with the time difference that would have been the case either way. I have to admit that it did take me just over 24 hours but I did complete the push-ups in the end. It was actually easier than I'd expected. The biggest challenge was just finding the time. Luckily everyone pretty much just hangs out and eats to celebrate over here so we didn't have training. I feel pretty good that I got them done even though I didn't really feel like pushing myself on one of the few days off I've had since coming here. It's something I can be proud of and now I can take a couple days off from push-ups and still be ahead.

People really know how to celebrate here. There's been fireworks and fire crackers going off day and night. It's pretty loud too, they set them off literally right on the doorstep sometimes!

My stances still suck

Well I'm still working on my stances. I think they've improved a bit but there's still a long way to go. Every Wednesday is a half day and in our morning class we have a big demonstration where we all take turns getting up in front of the class and performing our forms. This week I got my sister to film a couple of my forms so I could see how they looked. It was pretty disappointing. My sword form had improved from last week, I've really been concentrating on lowering my stances in that form and I think it's helped a bit already. Another form I did was pure crap though! My stances were way to high, I had no power, and my movements were not clear enough. Everyone else seemed to think it was alright but I was not impressed with myself. It's certainly encouraged me to practice that form more though so in the end it's a good thing. That's what I like about videotaping forms. You either do them well and feel good about yourself or you don't and then you are inspired to practice harder.

As far as my UBBT student requirements, all is well. Push-ups are on schedule. It's been really easy to do certain requirements here where others have been more challenging. I'm hoping it'll all even out once I get home.

Only about 2 more weeks to go. I still have lots that I want to learn and improve on. I hope that I will be able to get it all done.

mmmmmmmm

January 16th already?

It seems like I just got to China but my time here is almost over! In about 3 weeks Mel and I will be home in Canada(Jiananda)again. I feel like I've learned so much and improved a lot but at the same time there's still so much room for growth. My stances especially could be lower. I had a dream the other night that I was in class and doing forms and our instructor gave me a hard time for not having low enough stances. He asked 'how long have you been training for? your stances should be perfect by now'. I'm not exactly a dream expert but I figured I would take it at face value and work on my stances anyways.

As far as the UBBT goes, I'm doing fairly well. Keeping up with my push-ups and sit-ups. I'm already ahead on the mileage and I get some more running in almost every day. I'm looking forward to being at home and sharing the experience a little more with the other members, sometimes I feel a little out of the loop over here in China.

I'm interested to get home and see if my improvements are noticeable to my classmates. I wonder if our one hour classes will seem strange after training for 2-3 hours 2 times a day.

I'm also really excited to eat western food! I like Chinese food as much as the next guy but I get bored of eating it 3 times a day every day. Can't wait for spaghetti, salad, burritos, bbq'd veggies......mmmmmm.

A New Year

Christmas didn't seem like Christmas and new years didn't seem like new years. Things like that feel strange here, just like any other day. The only real difference for me is that I've been doing a lot more push-ups. I was already tracking them but now I'm being much more diligent and forcing myself to do more. Since there's no indoor heating here it's also a great way to stay warm!

I used to be able to get to the UBBT website easily but the Chinese firewall has caught up with me and now I have to go through a proxy site. I had to email my mom and get here to register me because said proxy site would now allow my to view the entire registration screen. Once I'm registered though I believe everything will be more straightforward.

Something I've learned now is not to get bent out of shape when things don't work out the way you expected them to. Being here and dealing with China's unique challenges has made me better able to deal with minor setbacks I think. I used to get frustrated with stuff like that really easily but I'm noticing that change already. Like when I logged onto our schools google group on Jan 3rd and saw that other students were starting off the new year by doing 1000 push ups and sit ups and that I had missed the entire thing. Normally I would be really upset but now I've shrugged and decided that I'll do the same thing on Chinese new year instead. There you go, problem solved, no need for any drama.

On a side note, training is going well. I'm learning 2 new forms right now and they're both awesome! Did some sparring the other day and got punched in the nose. It hurts a bit to blow my nose but it was a lot of fun and I look forward to gearing up when I get home.