The break has begun!

On Wednesday Shifu spontaneously gave us an extra week and a half of break time so we are officially off now. yay.

My mom is checking into changing our flight home so we'll have another 5 days or so in Canada. If that works out we'll be super happy to head home early, if not, we plan to go spend several days in the city of Xi'an and see a bunch of historically significant sights as well as rest and eat some tasty meals. Either way we'll have a great time. It seems so bizarre that such a long awaited break has started unexpectedly early.

I woke up with a cold yesterday and spent almost the entire day in bed but I'm feeling better already. Hopefully this means I won't get sick on the way home like I did last year, though I suspect that was due to eating something that didn't agree with me and not a virus.

Well I may be incommunicado for a few days next week depending on our flights but should be back into the swing of things shortly thereafter.

It's December!

The break is getting closer and closer and I continue to get more excited. I'm really looking forward to going home again this year.

I don't really have a lot to say other than that. Last night we got an impromptu lesson from Shifu about internal alchemy. Really cool. Of course we won't start to practice that stuff for a long time yet, it was just the theory. He also talked about how skipping the physical training at the beginning and starting with the spiritual stuff was dangerous. It could even make you go crazy. Good incentive to be patient, not that I have another master to learn it from anyway.

Well, until next week....

There are only 3 weeks left now until the break. I spend most of my time thinking about it. It's pretty distracting sometimes in class and especially in meditation. I've been dreaming a lot about the food I'm going to be eating, I hope I don't manage to make myself sick by eating too much at first. I'll try to control myself and stick to simple homemade foods for the first few days. Our first family meal my mom is going to make homemade chili with corn bread. mmmmm..... I can't wait!

While we are still training, my heart's not in it as much as it should be. Luckily I train in a structured manner that doesn't even require much self-motivation. Just show up to class and do what you're told, it's simple. Some people still manage to slack off but you kinda have to do that on purpose, it doesn't just happen.

Well, I look forward to seeing you all when I get back. Maybe we can go for some food? haha.

Be careful what you wish for.

Reading last weeks post makes me laugh. We were certainly whipped into shape this week in a rather painful manner. My quads haven't been so sore in a very long time. By Wednesday I was totally done. I had a really good weekend though. Wednesday afternoon massage followed by movie night and snacks. Thursday I slept in till almost 8, chatted on skype with some family, knit for a few hours, ate a nice big lunch and then, another movie. Pretty restful. I've been doing quite a bit of knitting lately, something about the cold weather just makes me want to snuggle up with some yarn and needles. It's nice to have something to do in the off time that has nothing to do with training, and this is a lot more productive than computer games.

It's only a month now until the break and I'm getting super excited. I know the time will just fly and I'll be home in no time. yay!

This week our Shifu's wife had a baby so he's been very busy and spends most of his time at the hospital. Our training is still going alright, we have plenty of senior students to learn from and it's been kind of fun to push myself instead of having someone else do it for me. A few of my classmates however, are struggling. They seem to have almost no self-discipline. I can't understand how one can reach adulthood AND be a martial artist and not have developed that aspect of his character. Some people have been late for almost every class this week, missing classes for no reason, being lazy during class time, and complaining constantly the whole time. It's kind of annoying. On one hand, I know that I should just ignore them and focus on myself but on the other hand, the whole mood of our training and our instructors is affected by them. Hopefully next week someone will whip them into shape. If not, I'll just keep my attention on me and improving myself.

wow what a week. We trained pretty hard this week and really did a lot with the tai ji 108. My legs were like jelly for several days straight. Had a massage last night though and I'm feeling good and ready to start the new week. Hopefully I notice an improvement as far as my leg strength goes this time!

We started learning the tai chi 108 this week. It's really cool. I'm surprised we started it now because it was scheduled for next year but Shifu said he wants us to fix our stances and 108 will help. He's got us doing super low stances while we do it and man is it killer on the legs! Although it is very difficult I can feel it making my legs stronger and my knees healthier already. I can't wait to show my mom how low we do it when I come home, she's going to flip out! haha.

I am getting pretty sick of China. Maybe it's just that I'm homesick and I need a break but I've definitely been noticing more and more things that really suck about living here.

1.No matter how long you live here or how fluent you are, if you don't look Chinese, you're a foreigner. Even to people you've gotten to know quite well, you're a novelty to be stared at and puzzled over. Like an animal in the zoo.

2.When a lot of the people here see foreigners, they see dollar bill signs and will try to get whatever they can out of you. From the guy you've bought noodles from every week for a year suddenly trying to scam you out of an extra 1 RMB to the parents of the really young Chinese kids pressuring the school to offer FREE Chinese classes taught by foreigners, it just seems never-ending. I understand that people are often struggling financially but not every westerner has money to burn and it's tiring to be cheated all the time.

3.Why is the food always drenched in oil? I can't escape it even by eating simple vegetable dishes. The least oily food I've found here is plain bread and noodle soup with a greasy film on top. I won't go into details but I don't think it's very good for the digestion. Every foreigner has stories to tell about getting sick from eating the food here and that's not even including the food poisoning stories.

4.It's so loud! Fireworks, car horns, construction sounds, karaoke, it's hard to escape even in a small town like this. Even just people talking on their phones feel the need to scream everything. I could walk around with earplugs in all the time and not miss a thing. It'd all just be at a more reasonable volume.

5.The Government. I don't even know where to start with this one...I used to complain about corrupt politicians and bureaucrats at home but trust me when I say this: You have no idea. I've never seen a system so completely disorganized and inefficient. The ONLY way to get anything done involves greasing plenty of palms while you do it. It's absolutely a matter of 'you scratch my back, I'll scratch yours'. If the government tells you to jump, your only choice is to do it quickly or pay the price.

People think that due to oppression, Chinese people never complain about the government but it's not true. Everyone knows that the system is unfair, in fact there are almost weekly protests all over the country with thousands of people but we never hear about them in the media. The participants are often beaten or thrown in jail without trial and it's all kept hush hush. I think it's ok to write this here because blogspot is already blocked by the Chinese firewall anyways.

Another thing is that there is just so much emphasis on 'saving face'. I know that this is a cultural difference but I didn't realize how frustrating it could be until now. It's almost impossible to speak directly on many topics, instead you must word things so carefully and talk circles around the issues. Almost no one takes responsibility for mistakes or oversights, instead it is pushed on to 'someone else' and if you press the issue it is considered extremely rude. Even getting a simple question answered is sometimes a huge ordeal.

There is much about the 'authorities' here to complain about but one of the most ridiculous is the love of flamboyance and pomp in all official affairs. Every time someone of high standing in the government does anything there are fireworks, red carpets, processions, speeches, flowers, gifts, etc. I believe that after the fall of the Qing dynasty, all of the reverence placed on the imperial court was simply transfered over to the communist government. At least it's entertaining.

Well, I'm pretty much spent now. Thanks for reading my rant, I feel better for having written all this down. Only 2 more months until I get to have a break from all this stuff. yay!

Next week is the "4th International Wushu Competition"....thing....in Shiyan (the nearest big city) so we've been very busy. Once again we're doing some opening ceremony performance with Jackie Chan and some other performance on the mountain. We still haven't even seen Jackie Chan but it seems like anywhere he goes the government just scrambles to find any foreigners they can and throw them on stage with him. Any way they can think of to exploit both him and us.

Well we've been very busy practicing for 2 separate performances but at least we get to do real forms so it's not a complete waste of our time. Soon it'll be over and everything will be back to normal, hopefully we can avoid any more of this stuff until after the break. I thought training internal kung fu in a mountain town would be peaceful! haha

I'm really starting to itch for the break, not because I need to rest from training, because I'm getting kind of sick of living in China and I really miss Canada. I'll write more about why Canada is a better place to live in my next post.

There are some weeks that I just don't WANT to blog. I don't WANT to write about myself. I'm tired. I'm sore. I just WANT to be alone. When it comes right down to it I don't really WANT to train either....but I do. I train and I write even though I don't WANT to do it and it's those weeks that really build me up. I can look back and say that I did what I said I would do. I kept that promise to myself. This is one of those weeks.

This week was the second stat holiday we've had in the last 3 weeks. It's been great. A few weeks ago was the moon festival and we had an extra 2 days off and then this week was "China's National Day" so we got another extra day off. Now there are no more holidays until our Christmas break so it's been a nice time. Shifu bought a fancy new karaoke machine so we used that a few times already. If they can afford it, every celebration here has karaoke and it's always on full blast!

Well the extra rest days have been needed. We've been training really hard since the weather cooled off a bit so everyone is kind of tired. Although my knees are giving me trouble at times again, I'm really enjoying the stuff we're doing now. It's tough but we've mostly been working on things which are my weaknesses so I feel like I'm improving a lot. Since we train several times almost every day, it can be hard to see improvements in yourself so I really like being able to see that right now. We're practicing a lot of speed drills for kicks, forms, etc as well as working a lot on sparring training, especially the footwork. This morning we spent a good 45 minutes just doing high side kicks (another weakness) and it was really helpful.

There's not much else to say....I really hope we change the schedule soon. During the summer we have meditation in the afternoon and then train in the evening until 9:30/10pm but the rest of the year we have that class in the afternoon and then after dinner we just have meditation so we can go to bed as early as 9. When you have to get up at 4:50am, early bedtimes are a good thing! Maybe this week we'll change it....I hope so.

This has been a rather strange week. There are a lot of changes happening at the school right now. Our class has started training together with one of the Chinese kids classes. Let me explain: all of the students at the school are split up into numbered classes according to how long they've been here and their skill level. 1st class is the long time Chinese students who help coach other students and already know almost all of the forms, they have been here for 4-8 years and are between 18 and 23 years old. The 2nd class is Chinese students who have been here for 2 or 3 years, they know a lot more than we do and are super duper fast. They are usually around 15-17 years old. 3rd class is my class, we're all foreigners in the traditional program who have been here for just over 1 year. We're really old (20-35) by Chinese standards and thus have pretty unique strengths and weaknesses. Then there is the 4th class of Chinese students who have been here less than a year, some as young as 10. There is also the other foreigners class called the "health promotion class" for a wild assortment of people from all over the world who stay for anywhere from 2 years to 2 days.

This week the 2nd class's teacher had to go home for a family emergency and 2 other coaches are going to teach in Europe for a month so Shifu has combined our class with theirs. Luckily we're working on something that they really needed to review but it's still really bizarre to be training with them. It's not much more difficult training but the vibe of the class makes it a lot more challenging. Most of the kids are terrified of Shifu so you can practically smell their fear in the air. It's really difficult to stay relaxed in that kind of environment and really tiring too. We were all pretty happy to get to the weekend.

I'm sure that a few more weeks like this and everyone will relax and get in the groove. It's helping my Chinese a lot so that's cool and I know we'll get faster just through osmosis.

http://www.wudanggongfu.com/kungfu/xingyi.htm

Here's the address to our schools Xing Yi page. It's not too in depth but if anyone wants to learn a little about the style we're learning right now you can get an overview. I'm really enjoying this stuff so far, although it's definitely not easy. I think it will help us become better fighters too. It seems very combat effective to me, especially the footwork.

It's been a good week. I knew it was going to be rough when I had sore muscles halfway through mid-morning class on Friday. Only 6 days left after that! haha. It was great to be back into training though and we started learning a new style called Xing Yi. It's not just one form but a whole system of forms and fighting training with an internal side too. I'm excited to start working on something that requires a whole new way of moving again. Up to now we've mostly been doing long fist style which is good for beginners because it really opens up your body and helps you keep relaxed but it's exciting to move on to a more advanced style. I'm enjoying the feeling of unfamiliarity that comes with each new move we learn, it's like starting all over again from scratch.

There is a really important tournament coming up next month which quite a few people from our school will be competing in. Our Shifu sent the cream of the crop from his most advanced class to try out for the Wudang team in the 'traditional kung fu' division a few days ago. These guys are absolutely amazing! Funny thing is that not even one of them made the team, instead the judges chose only students from the Wudang performance team who don't know any traditional forms at all. They did modern wushu and got selected for the 'traditional kung fu' team. It's completely ridiculous but, sadly, not surprising. Modern wushu is so much more highly valued by the government here that things like this happen all the time. It really reminded me of why I'm here. Shifu decided to create a traditional class for foreigners for this reason, he believes (and I agree with him) that this style will not survive in it's current form within China. In order to save this tradition, we have to take it outside of China. It's sad but true and I just hope it works.

On a more personal note I've been thinking a lot lately about what I really need to be happy. When we first came here last year I brought so much stuff with me that I thought I would need and would really use a lot but as time goes by I realize how unnecessary it all is. I run out of things or they get broken/lost and I just don't miss them. At home it's so easy to accumulate stuff even without buying it for yourself. I guess I could do the same here if I wanted to but I have everything I need for training and beyond that.....there's not a lot of opportunity for much else. It' hard to explain but the longer I spend here, the less excited I get about 'stuff'. Even food. I used to love food and it was one of my greatest pleasures to eat really delicious food but now it's more for sustenance and less for pleasure. Mom, if you're reading this, I still look forward to eating your home-cooked meals when I come home this year so don't think you're off the hook! haha

Beijing Catastrophe

I'm sorry I haven't written anything for a few weeks, our 4 day trip turned into a surprise 16 days and the firewall is a lot tougher to get through in Beijing.

Upon arriving at the train station we were informed that we'd be there for over 2 weeks instead of 4 days, someone either lied or there was some mis-communication. From there almost everything that could go wrong did. Everyday was incredibly stressful and frustrating. I don't want to go into details but suffice it to say that we were not treated very well and that I've never in my life witnessed a system so disorganized and inefficient. I've been told that it's just the way things are run in China and if that's the case, I hope I never have to do something like that again. It was a complete waste of time! Each day we spent 8 to 13 hours in a grey waiting room and practiced our part of the performance once or twice for about 15 minutes total. We could have done all of the rehearsing in our 2 week stay in less than 1 day. I was pretty miserable the whole time thinking about all the training I was missing out on.

I'm so happy to be back here! I did get to rest my body while I was away but my state of mind is a complete mess. I'm still having stress dreams and my emotions are all over the map. I hope that in a week or so I'll be back to my normal self.

Well, that's a very brief overview of what I've been up to lately. Beijing sucked but now I'm back and I just want to forget about it and focus on training.

I'm off to Beijing tonight with 9 of my classmates. We will be doing a performance there in 2 days and hopefully resting a lot too. Though I'm looking forward to a change, it sucks doing these kinds of things because there is always some modern wushu choreographer who wants to change everything we do. Ours arrived today and has basically made up an entire form in about 5 minutes with the fo chen for us to learn. The fo chen is the horse hair whisk and is a traditional taoist weapon....that we haven't learned yet. She has included all sorts of weird movements and spinning on tip toes and the worst sort of fluff you can imagine, she even wanted us to do aerials and front flip stuff but we're not a performance team and most of us can't do that stuff very well. uhhhh. Very annoying.

At least we get to go to Beijing, I just hope there's time to relax too.

I was going through everyones journals on the Silent River Kung Fu website and I have to say something.

A lot of people are not blogging regularly, I check those journals every week and I should be looking at a new entry for everyone each time...I'm not. Posting each week is really a great way to track your progress and stay involved with both your classmates and your own goals. It also helps to keep your teachers informed about where you're at in your training so they can help you progress.

UBBT members, unless I'm mistaken journaling is a non-negotiable part of your commitment. Look to the example of Sifu Freitag, while travelling all over the world she managed to blog every week. Constantly searching for a place with internet access so she could get up her posts, even walking along the side of the highway to get there, she managed to keep her commitment, one she often doesn't enjoy. If she can do that, and if I can manage to constantly find new ways to sneak past the Chinese firewall each week for my posts, I believe each of you can post from the comfort of your homes and workplaces without much trouble.

It's time to get back in the game and pick up the slack! I hope to see a new post for everyone next week.

It's finally cleared up here and it's hot, hot, hot again. I'm not complaining though because at least now if I wait long enough, the sweat does eventually dry.

I'm feeling pretty good this week. I had a lot of energy for training and it sure felt great to be outside again. I wish there was a way to train outside in Canada all year round but I don't see how it's possible. At least back home I don't have to worry about all my clothes getting moldy in the closet after a few weeks of rain. That was a rather unpleasant discovery. I'd mentioned having to wash clothes the old fashioned way and now imagine doing half your wardrobe at once....yuck.

Anyway, things are going well overall. the school is packed right now so Shifu's been really busy which means we're left to our own devices more often now. It's kind of nice to review and practice on your own sometimes. I'm enjoying motivating myself again, feels a little like last year during the UBBT. Choosing goals and pushing forward on them.... it's a fantastic feeling.

Rain, rain go away already!

It's been raining off and on here for at least 2 weeks straight now. I've heard that large parts of southern China have flooded and there's no end in sight. Every time I check the forecast I see a weeks worth of little cartoon rain clouds in my future.

Not only does it suck training indoors when the school is at full capacity and there's no room for anything, it's so humid that you're basically standing in a cloud at all times. Usually before lunch I take my sweat-drenched training clothes and hang them up to dry for evening class(a little gross I admit but if you had to hand wash and hang to dry you'd stretch the laundry too). Now the air is so damp, they never get dry. I could leave them there for 2 days and they'd still be damp. Lucky for you guys, you're too far away to smell me!

At least it's only 30 degrees out instead of 40, I don't have to worry about sunstroke right now either. haha

Well other than that, all's well. I've been studying Chinese a lot and I'm happy with my improvement. In a few months when I'm finished with my audio lessons, I can start a new program for INTERMEDIATE speakers. oh la la.

There are two excellent articles written by one of my classmates here about Taoism and how, in the west, we often don't get the whole story. Everything is over-simplified and yet abstracted and all the practical points for beginners are missing.

http://www.wudangtaoistarts.com/articles-1/yu-huang-xin-yin-miao-jing/

http://www.wudangtaoistarts.com/articles-1/a-commentary-on-practice/

There is an interesting parallel between what is written in the second article and what Sifu Brinker always says about practice. A lot of what we do you can only learn through direct experience and repetition, reading and talking about it will not help you to achieve mastery.

Something that my teacher here talks about is that experiences of Qi (chi) come from our bodies, not our minds. We need to train our bodies to be healthy, strong, and sensitive before we can start to feel our own Qi on a deep level. If people have these intense visions and feelings without the foundation of physical practice, it is often just an illusion created by the mind to entertain us. The first step is to train your body. The rest comes later. Many people want to skip the 'hard stuff' and go right to the mystical, magical type of training but as we all know, you can't build a house with no foundation.

Anyways, check out these articles for an interesting perspective that's different from what we generally have access to in the west.

This week training has gone well. We started learning a new form called capturing the dragon, taming the tiger fist and though it's challenging, I'm really enjoying it. I look back on how difficult it was to learn new forms a year ago and I'm really happy with how far I've come.

I really need to work on my Chinese more though. I've been slacking pretty hard on that for the past 2 months or so and I've hardly learned any new words. It's pretty easy after a hard class to just lie around on my bed napping and watching a movie or something but it's not much more effort to do an audio lesson at some point in the day. They're only half an hour anyways and I think I can squeeze in a few each week. I'd like to be pretty much fluent by the end of the program so I'd better get to work then!

Canada day in China:

Just like any other day really. Luckily it falls on a Thursday, our day off, so we get to rest and relax. It's super hot and humid today so I haven't done much besides reading in my room with a fan on full blast. Ran a few errands and went out for lunch earlier but after that I just hurried home and took a cool shower. It's been a nice day but I still long for a little taste of Canadiana, maybe some barbecued veggie burgers and grilled veggies, homemade salsa and chips, good ice cold beer, national anthem....ahhh. I'd mention the fireworks but those are pretty much at least a weekly thing here so it's not very special.

Well everyone at home please enjoy one of the above for me. It's funny how things like this seem so much more important when you're away from home. Happy Canada Day!

This week we took a short trip to a temple nearby. The temple is called Wu Long Gong, Five Dragons Temple, and it is still inaccessible by road. The government is building a road to it but so far you still have to hike in. Wednesday we got up early and took a bus to the end of the road and from there we walked in. We had a nice group lunch that the people who live there prepared for us and then hiked up to the top of the mountain. It was thankfully overcast and though still hot, not as punishing as it has been of late. Then we had dinner and relaxed for a few hours before bed. I slept terribly on 2 beds pushed together for 3 people, no pillow, no mosquito net, no door and in my sweaty clothes. Then we got up, ate breakfast and hiked for about 5 hours or so to another temple. This temple is on the main tourist route and we took a bus back from there.

Though it was a challenging hike, we all made pretty good time and enjoyed ourselves. The worst part was definitely the lack of a view. In Canada a day of mountain climbing has lovely scenery, cool mountain air, and a feeling of accomplishment upon reaching the summit. This was more like hours of hiking through a humid, buggy jungle. The plant life is so thick, you can't see anything that's not right in front of you. Some parts of it were so thick, you could hardly see the trail under your feet.

Though it was tough, we all managed to get through it together and Shifu gave us a day off today to recover. I'm actually not sore at all! It's strange, I was expecting at least my knees to be sore but I feel completely fine, just tired. It's a pretty cool sign of how much stronger we've all gotten and how much more stamina we have.

I'd still take a nice hike in rockies over this though. Sometimes I really miss Canada.

It is hot!

Summer is here in Wudang and man is it something. I remembered reading that we were in a mountainous subtropical region but in the winter when it gets cold enough to snow sometimes that's easy to forget. Well not only is it scorching hot (around 40) but it's also really humid most of the time. We just had a week of rain and now this week the temperature just shot up. The perfect recipe for buggy, muggy, hot weather. Normally I really enjoy that we train outside in the ruins of a really cool temple but there have been more than a few days lately where I wished we had an indoor training hall with good old fashioned ceiling fans. Alas, that is not the case. Luckily Shifu is merciful and we usually save our most rigorous training for the evening class. Morning classes end at 11am and then we take a siesta until meditation at 3:30pm so the hottest part of the day we're inside. It's still pretty rough on a couple of pale Canadian girls though. I've managed to avoid sunburns so far but I sure didn't avoid getting eaten alive. I'm currently sporting about 30 black fly and mosquito bites which is pretty uncomfortable at times.

Well that's enough complaining for now. I hope to become accustomed to this in another couple of weeks. We've been working on perfecting our forms lately and improving our sidekicks. It's been good training, not as exciting as learning new forms but just as important.

Until next time.

We are putting in a new concrete training area in the courtyard at our school so these past 3 days we've been helping out with that instead of training. It's hard work but a nice change from our usual weekly schedule actually. It makes training seem so nice too. When you're practicing for 8 hours every day and each week is the same, sometimes you forget how much you love it, a little absence makes the heart grow fonder though.

However, I really don't have much to say again! I'm going to buy a bicycle to ride around our town and I'm pretty excited.

Sometimes I really don't know what to write. Certain weeks are pretty eventful and others are just kind of business as usual.

We learned a whole form this week. A relatively short little empty hand form. Everyone is really good at it already, and when I mentioned that to Shifu he agreed. We discussed how the quality of ones basics really show when doing forms. If you have good stances and kicks and are well coordinated, it makes all the difference. You can know a form backwards and forwards but if your basics are lacking it'll still look terrible. On the other hand if you practice your basics hard every day, you can learn to do any movement well.

I'm starting to feel more comfortable and at home here. I can tell partly because of my dreams. Up until recently most of my dreams still took place back home with people from my old life but in the past couple weeks that's started to change. An interesting one the other night was a combination of new and old. I was working at Planet Organic again and needed to get something from the deli but was unsure if I was allowed to go behind their counter. I was hesitating and someone told me that Shifu said it was alright to go back there if we had to grab something and no staff were around. I actually woke up and started laughing, that struck me as pretty funny.

Well, that's about it for this round. Maybe I'll have some awesome story to tell next time.

Well, I did exactly what the doctor said I should do about my knees. No jumping for about 2 months and I've tried really hard to pay attention and if something doesn't feel good, I stop. It really paid off too because now my knees are feeling better and better, they're definitely healing. Last week they were quite sore and I thought I was going backwards for my recovery but this week they've been feeling stronger and stronger. My stances are back to where they were before the injury, I can do small jumps without pain, and I'm running farther and faster than I've been able to in a long time. I still make sure to stretch my quads (and consequently the tendons above and beside the knee) a lot, massage often, put my legs up the wall at the end of the day, and pay attention to what I'm doing. I think it won't be too much longer before I can do some serious jumping again and be completely knee pain free. yay! It's been frustrating but I'm so glad I decided to be sensible about training with this injury. Totally worth it.

whew!

I know I haven't posted in 2 weeks and it's been rather eventful. We had a performance to do in the town square around labour day (in may here apparently) that were completely insane. There were Chinese tourists everywhere and when we arrived they completely surrounded us wanting pictures with the foreigners in kung fu gear. It was really overwhelming, the performance actually took a back seat to the crazy hoard of picture seekers. A few of the senior Chinese students made a human barrier around us. Crazy. Then a week of training. Then on our "day off" last week we had a huge celebration for the grandmasters birthday with free lunch (kinda cool), speeches (in Chinese), schmoozing, and more performances. Then yesterday instead of meditation we all had to go watch some Sanda matches and demonstrations with some of our students and some visitors from Hong Kong. It was really interesting to see how incredibly fast our older kung fu brother is compared to the other guys. They all had martial arts training but were unprepared for him and were really impressed. Pretty cool to watch and it gives us inspiration to train hard too. So basically it was exhausting and this week of training was rather difficult to get through but now it's a rainy Wednesday afternoon and all I have planned is lots of R n' R until Friday. Tonight Mel and I and a few friends are going to get foot massages. They are so great after a long week, I've been looking forward to it for days.

The other day we took a walk through the mountains and it was absolutely beautiful. Everything is so lush and green with wild flowers blooming everywhere and scenting the air. On the slope directly behind the school there are lots of orange trees with lovely white blossoms smelling of neroli (a rare and expensive oil) and all through the mountains there are wild roses and other pretty, fragrant flowers in bloom. Spring really is in the air. When we train in the evening you can smell flowers the entire time. It's really something compared to the usual Chinese smells of garbage, cooking oil, and sewage. I wish it was like this all the time.

Our traditional class has started a website, it's still a work in progress but if you feel like checking it out here's the address:

www.wudangtaoistarts.com

Though I still have a nagging cough, I'm feeling much better now. It took a few days to recover but I'm pretty much normal now except for my lungs. After the morning run I cough really hard for a few minutes and usually when I lay down to go to sleep in the evening too but it's slowly improving.

It's been really hot here which makes it kinda tough to train hard and also makes me nervous about the coming summer but it sure is easier to stretch. After making little to no improvement all winter long I'm back to stretching in full swing and already noticing some improvement. Pretty cool. It's also a lot easier to breathe when we're drilling forms over and over again in quick succession and while running. Now I have to make sure to use sunscreen, bug spray, and drink lots of water.

We're working on a straight sword form called Xuen Men Jian, I actually learned it last year and performed it at the Tiger challenge but now we're going over it again and I'm able to really work on the details. I'm really pleased with it and think it might just end up being my best form this year, Shifu even came over to me a few days ago and said 'your sword...good' which is really high praise around here and made me feel so happy.

Still working on the website idea, it'll happen soon I swear!

I have a really bad chest cold right now. Missed a day and a half of classes but I'm starting to feel a little better now. Still have to sleep propped up on a pile of pillows though so I don't just spend the entire night coughing and not sleeping. I'm pretty tired and I don't have a whole lot to say at this point. Hope to feel better soon.

This week we had our first ever sparring class here in China.

Let me start off by saying that if you taught a class like this in the west, you'd get sued. Or you'd end up with an entire school of macho mouth breathers.

Basically it consisted of Shifu pairing us off and everyone standing in a circle watching each match of about 10 straight minutes. We had cheap boxing gloves and no other equipment and the only guidance we were given before beginning was to use only punches for now, no kicks until we were more experienced (the only real caution as far as I can see) then we went at it. Some of us had years of experience and some of us had absolutely zero but this was not acknowledged in any way. Most of the time the only feedback we were given was to punch harder. Some people were so afraid they either crouched into a ball with hands over their head, or started crying. When one woman with years of competitive fighting experience in Russia gave her partner with zero experience a bloody nose and black eye, she was not scolded at all, Shifu's reassurance was to tell him that this is a 'normal' part of sparring practice. I was lucky to end up paired with Mel whom I'm very familiar with but after our match we were told that we wouldn't be allowed to spar again because we love each other too much to try to hurt each other. I don't want to try to hurt anyone, I just want to learn, but I guess I'll have to change that if I'm going to participate in these classes.

Although it was pretty intense and I don't approve of the way it was handled, I feel confident after watching everyone that I can hold my own against any of them for the most part. It made me feel so grateful for the training I've done at Silent River over the years. If I didn't have that experience behind me I would have been completely overwhelmed and probably terrified. The way we are taught is so effective and there is so much emphasis placed on control and safety that nobody needs to be afraid. We can all learn together. After seeing the way things are done here, I have a new appreciation for the structure of sparring lessons at home. I now have an example for when I open my own school one day of how to go about the sparring training....and how not to.

Thanks Sifu Brinker for your intelligent fighting training. I'd be lost here without it.

I finished with my acupuncture treatments on Tuesday and can start back with normal training again this week. They did tell me that the problem I have with the ligament isn't fixed yet, it'll take time to heal and I'll have to not re-injure it in the meantime, which means no big jumping for 2 months. I'm kind of disappointed that it'll take so long but I'm also grateful that I can do the rest of the training pretty much as normal. I'm still going to wear knee braces when running and drilling forms just to be safe, especially in the beginning. I'm really happy to be able to participate fully in class again.

On a completely different topic, I'm thinking of creating my own website and instead of using this blog, I'll journal on there. Blogspot is blocked in China so I can't upload any pictures or change my settings because I have to use a proxy site which blocks certain activities. blah blah blah, boring computer stuff, the point is that hopefully soon you will be able to check my journal entries, see pictures and videos, and other neat features all in one location. I am not particularly savvy at this sort of thing so don't get too impatient, it could take a while.

So I finally decided to do something about my knees already. They've been bothering me off and on for at least a month now but other than stretching and massage I didn't really know what to do about it. Shifu suggested I try acupuncture at the local hospital and today was my 5th session. The doctor said I would need at least a week of treatment and reduced activity so I am doing my best to take it easy for now.

The treatments consist of needles in both knees hooked up to a mild electrical current for about an hour with a heat lamp (the best part by far) pointed at my knees. Then they do cupping on the area by placing hot bamboo cups on the points which creates suction and pulls my flesh up inside them, leaving circular shaped bruises on my legs. The last and most painful step is a herbal injection into my knee. Apparently the tendon or ligament doesn't have enough circulation so they inject a herbal solution into the problem area to move the blood and chi. Although at first I was really skittish about the injection, I do think it's doing some good. It's hard to be patient because my western mind wants to see significant results right away but I know that I'll have to finish the treatments and slowly start training harder again before I can really see much difference.

The doctor said no running, jumping, low stances, or kicks for the meantime which basically leaves me with a modified qigong and tai chi practice for now with lots of standing meditation and dragon claw practice. Though it's hard not to do the things I'm used to, I try to be sensible. I constantly remind myself that pushing myself too much, too fast is probably the worst thing for my progression in the long run. It's especially hard to rest here because any type of reduced activity comes with feelings of guilt and doubt, as if the problem isn't actually that bad and my mind is creating an excuse not to train. I have to remember that I am an adult with lots of training experience and lots of motivation and that sometimes resting is the best thing for an injury.

Thanks a lot to those who offered me advice last week, I've been much calmer these past few days. After putting some thought into it I know that part of the problem was my knee (I've been dealing with some tendon tightness and pain in the knee) as well as the fact that I haven't been sleeping well at night. The knee is slowly getting better with daily massages and (duh!) wearing a brace for running and tai chi in the morning and as the pain lessens so does my morning grumpiness. The other problem of not sleeping well is a bit more complicated. It's an ugly cycle of going to sleep dreading the morning run which causes me to have a very restless sleep which in turn makes the run that much worse. I practiced the meditation Sifu Olsvik described in his comment on my post to help process emotions before sleeping for the past 2 nights and I'm sleeping much better so far. I think once I can get over this emotional response/resistance I have to the structure of our morning run, I'll improve way more quickly. This week I'll try waking up 5 or 10 minutes earlier and trying it in the morning too. We'll see how that goes.

On a different note we finished learning our broadsword form and now we're going to do what we always do and drill the heck out of it until we can do it super fast as a group. I didn't realize how much faster I'd gotten in general until we had a few students who aren't in our class join in on our training this week and watched how much of a struggle it is for them to keep up with us. It's nice once in a while to take a look back and see how far you've come. It's inspiring and can really renew your passion for practice.

I'm very tired and I have to get up very early so this will be a short post.

We started running at 5 am again since the weather is warmer. I really wish that I enjoyed this part of my day but the truth is that I don't. Getting back from a grueling run before daybreak and having 3 more classes ahead of me not including meditation is a disheartening feeling. I'm not the best runner in my class, I'm actually one of the worst, and I though I can make it to the end, it's a painful struggle every time. Music helps, thinking about something else helps, but it's not enough to keep the run from putting me in a bad mood at least until after breakfast. I really try to stay positive but that's so much harder at 5 in the morning. All I've been able to do so far this week involves NOT murdering anyone, screaming, or crying in the middle of class. My internal state is still in turmoil though. It's definitely something I need to change. Starting every day in such mental distress is neither desirable nor productive.

Any advice??

I don't have a whole lot to say this week. It went by relatively quickly and yesterday afternoon as well as today has been really restful. I feel like I'll be fully ready to train again tomorrow. Shifu's birthday was a few days ago and we had a big dinner with cake and singing to celebrate. A lot of fun. He said he's really happy with my class overall. We're progressing more quickly than he expected and he's teaching us more and more than he was planning on. We started broadsword and it's a super cool form. We're picking it up a lot faster than we were able to at the beginning of the program which is encouraging. He said the biggest problems we have as a group are flexibility and stamina. I can see gradual improvements in my stamina but my hips aren't getting any less stiff. When it gets warm we'll do tons of stretching though and hopefully see some progress there.

We start running again soon, as soon as it warms up. I'm really not looking forward to it. I've had a much more positive attitude since the break and I think it's helping me improve faster but I'm concerned that my mood will go down the tubes when we start waking up at 5 to run again. It's generally the crappiest part of my day, I really can't think of a worse way to start the day training-wise. Not the kind of thing to put you in a good frame of mind for the rest of the day. I guess we'll see how it goes, maybe it won't be so bad. I can only hope.

Feeling better this week. My knee is on the mend, the cold I was coming down with only lasted a few days and never got really bad, and though the week still seemed long it was only the usual 6 days. We finished learning Tai Yi Wu Xing Chuan and this week we start broadsword. Yes! It's called Xuen Gong Dao and is definitely one of the coolest broadsword forms I've seen. I hope to be really good at it someday and though it has some serious jumping involved (not my strong suit) I think my understanding of vectors will help me out. I guess we'll find out right away!

On a different note I've noticed some improvement in my meditation practice. Recently in our Taoism class Shifu translated a text for us which discusses meditation and such. There were certain lines that really spoke to me and seemed relevant to where I am right now. A lot is said about diligence, many people want the benefits of meditation but are not willing to spend the time on it. Shifu encouraged us not to make that mistake, he said it can take many years of practice before you can really control your chi. Really old texts like these are often translated mistakenly, giving people with little understanding the impression that amazing things can happen in only a few days but it really takes a very long time. I've only been here for 6 months so I'm basically a brand new beginner in the scheme of things and if all I can do now is sit and try to relax and breathe, that's fine. It's a start. The text also talks about how in our internal practice we have good days and bad days. Sometimes I am very relaxed and focused and can feel my Dan tian and other times I am uncomfortable and distracted, this is normal. I find it encouraging to know that everyone from now and backwards through time has had similar challenges on their journey. Some of what is discussed is way beyond my level but that too pushes me to carry on as I have something to work towards. The final line of the text is really awesome, it basically comes down to...

Do not be afraid of not knowing,
only be afraid of never trying to learn.

It could probably be put much more elegantly than that but you get the idea. Shifu always says that these ideas are useless if you don't put them into practice. It's exciting when you can see the ways in which you have done that in your own life. I enjoy that Taoism class, we're always learning such cool stuff.

Another really long week is over.

After our Chinese New Year break we had an eight day training week again which concluded with our performance day yesterday. Overall the week went relatively well and was only moderately hard which I appreciated a lot. The performance went smoothly too, Shifu seemed mildly pleased with our progress since the last time.

I mentioned that we were learning a slower form called Tai Yi Wu Xing Chuan and this particular form is quite challenging for the ankles, knees, and hips. I've learned it before and it's a lot of fun but my left knee is acting up and since I don't remember injuring it at all, I'm pretty sure it's just from the repetitive training. I went to get an acupressure massage yesterday and hopefully that helps along with a day off. I'm also starting to come down with a cold so I bought some medicine this morning and hope to avoid the worst of it. sigh. I'm really quite tired when it comes down to it. Hopefully I feel better soon.

What a LONG week!

Well there's no longer any need to feel trepidation about the gentleness of our first training week. Shifu definitely brought the beat down this week. We spent a lot of the early part of the week drilling forms over and over, always being pushed to do it better, faster, and more powerfully. Then the weather changed and almost every morning this week there was light rain which means we had to train inside. One would think we'd be happy to train inside on a cold day but it's generally the same temperature as outside and our options are rather limited for the activities we can do in our small indoor space. We ended up doing Sanda training every day (sometimes 2x) with lots of punches, combinations, and speed/power drills. One day we did power lifting, one day squats, frog jumps, duck walking, etc. It was ridiculous trying to walk down the stairs for 2 days afterwards.

Because it's Chinese New Year we get 4 days off this week but to make up for it we didn't get our usual Thursday off, making an already long week even longer. Needless to say we were all really relieved to see the end of this week.

On a different note, the celebrations have been really cool. Two things that are ubiquitous at Chinese New Year are food and fireworks and we've had plenty of both. Last night at midnight was a huge fireworks show with pretty much everyone in China blasting off explosives both big and small. A group of us foreigners got together and purchased some cool crates of fireworks to set off in addition to the ones that Shifu had already bought for us. But that's only half the fun because you can get a kajillion different firecrackers and small sticks of basically dynamite. There are really pretty ones that spin on the ground and look like flowers and big red sticks like something out of Loony Tunes that explode with a deafening BOOM and everything in between. Who knew blowing things up could be so much fun? Well after the week we had, it was an awesome (cheap) way to blow off some steam.

And now 3 more days off to rest before we get back to being pounded into a mushy pulp in class again.

hmmmm...

Week one since the break has come and gone. I was expecting to be pummeled into the ground with training but Shifu has taken it really easy on us so far. I'm glad because even so we were all ridiculously sore for a few days, luckily it passed quickly this time. Despite my relief I do have a sense of discomfort with the situation. I'm not sure whether it's because I'm waiting for the axe to fall or because I really wanted to be pushed to my limit. I guess it might sound like this week has been easy for me but it really showed me how much stamina I've lost over the break. Anyway I'm sure it's much more sensible to ease back into things. My legs and lungs are certainly grateful!

We started training Dragon Claw this week and it's really cool! First we practice a sequence of pushing the claws out in every direction in sync with our breathing, keeping everything in our hands and forearms tensed the entire time. Then we squat down and put our fingertips on the ground in claw formation practicing putting as much weight on them as we can (eventually we'll be able to do push ups like this) and finally we shake everything out and do some standing meditation with our hands in claws and practice relaxing our entire bodies. So far it's totally wicked awesome, my hands feel really powerful afterwards, like I could do magic with them or something, it's great. I really want to be DEVASTATING at Dragon claw so I plan to practice it alot. Shifu said we'll notice an improvement very quickly if we practice every day and not just in our hands but in all arm strength. He had a female student once, 30 years old, who could do 50 Dragon Claw push ups in a row, more than any of the guys. Pretty inspiring.

My stances are better than I'd remembered them being which is encouraging. I was really pushing myself to go wider and deeper and I'm starting to see some of the results. I imagine that'll only improve when my legs stop being sore.

We had to do about 4 separate performances and practices for performances this week. It's been kind of annoying. Especially this morning when I was lying in bed on my one day off and Jeff (our captain of sorts) comes in and 'asks' us to do an impromptu TV performance like right now! I threw my uniform on over my PJ's, grabbed a bottle of water and a bag of peanuts to consume on the way and we left. Did a (somewhat sleepy) performance at the temple with an unwashed face and unbrushed teeth and missed our weekly skype date with my parents. Not how I wanted to start my day but I guess being in the traditional program involves participation in that stuff whether we like it or not.

Back in Wudang...and it feels great!

We got in last night and by a strange twist of fate just in time for the day off so we don't start training until tomorrow. After flying to Vancouver for 2 days, Beijing for 3 days and then a 22 hour train ride to get here it's a big relief to just settle in and unpack. It's also a lot warmer here than it was when we left, today it's supposed to be 13 degrees and sunny. I can't wait to get started tomorrow! Over the break I had a lot of time to think about our training here and it really renewed my passion for it. Before the break I was feeling like I hadn't progressed enough and it was discouraging but if I just remember that I've only been here for 5 months and there's lots more time in the program I can relax a bit. I also have a lot less to worry about now that the UBBT is over. I still have goals that I'm working on but they all compliment each other and fit better with our daily practice so it feels like I'm moving in only one direction. I was never lazy in class but I think I train better with a positive mindset so now that I'm not feeling as discouraged I think I'll have more vigor and drive during class. I'm really looking forward to getting back into it. It's exactly the way I was hoping I'd feel which is awesome.

Back to the Grind

Well this break has been great. I had a wonderful time sitting around and reading some books. I got to spend time with the people I care about and do a few kung fu classes here. I even went snowboarding a couple of times. It's been really nice. I'm ready to go back now though. I want to get started on training again, I want to see my Sifu and all my kung fu brothers in Wudang, I want to spend the day outside and use my body. I'm really going to miss my parents though. Spending this month with them has been awesome and I wish I could see them more often but they're planning to come and visit us the year so I will look forward to that. Thanks to everyone who made this trip fun, I'll miss you all.