1000 Acts of Kindness

A few days ago I decided to go back and add up all my acts of kindness. Turns out I'm almost done my requirement! Crazyness. In some ways this requirement has been really easy, I like doing nice things for the people I care about, I can still do them if I'm injured, and they don't take up much time. In other ways it has been quite challenging, it takes some of the naturalness out of the acts and I feel sometimes like taking "credit" for things like this is contrary to the point. It has been interesting to think about. At first I had a hard time deciding what a "real" act of kindness is. Should I not count things that I would normally do? Should they be for strangers only? I ended up counting things that are not part of my usual daily routine and are for anyone, including my family and friends.

There are a few things I've learned from this. Acts of kindness benefit the giver as well as the receiver. I feel really good about myself when I make an effort to help someone else. People really appreciate it. I can't count how many people have thanked me profusely for the small things that I've done for them. Usually they seem surprised that anyone even took notice of them and they also seem to think that I'm a really great person. It doesn't change their minds to tell them that I am required to do things like this, they are still surprised that I would choose them over anyone else to show kindness to. I am realizing how little we normally go out of our way for someone else. It seems like most people spend a lot of time looking out for number one and not taking much time to think of others.

I hope that when this requirement is completed I can continue to do acts of kindness and know that I am doing it from my heart and not because I feel that I have to. I've developed a taste for kindness. And like a taste for blood, it can only be sated with one thing.....

Injury #2

So I had a good training week....up until wednesday night. During sparring I somehow sprained my ankle. I'm not sure exactly how it happened but Sifu prince was doing a takedown on me and I think I just landed on my foot funny and twisted it. Well it hurt a bit but the by the time I got home I was MAD! I was really frustrated because I don't have time for injuries right now, every day I need to be training hard and I can't afford to take days off. The next morning it was really stiff and sore. I had to take the day off of work AND jiu jitsu. By Friday I had it a little more in perspective, I decided to do the outline for the class I'm teaching at this years boot camp and catch up on some boring paperwork that I haven't had time for. Now it seems to be healing really quickly so I'm happy about that and I managed to participate in classes all day today with very little problem. I also got caught up on my push ups over the past few days so that's good. A setback like this can be frustrating but it really made me appreciate how lucky I am. There are others who are just as busy as I am that have much more severe problems, I should feel compassion for them, not sorry for myself.

Test of Character

UBBT. Ultimate Black Belt Test.

What can I say, it is exactly what it sounds like. A true test of character. There are many days where I wonder what ever posessed me to take this on. I am working full time, training in 2, soon to be 3 different martial arts, and trying to organize several different projects. I'm moving to China in August so I have less time to complete a lot of my requirements and preparations for that to deal with too.

On the other hand I've progressed in leaps and bounds. Combined with my previous trip to China, I've progressed more in the past few months than I have in the past few years! I would never have done a lot of the training I'm doing now if I didn't have the test to motivate me. So I'm really glad that I agreed to this even though some days I question my sanity! I think I'll look back on this period of my life as defining the person I'm becoming. And I like that person.

:)

I love Kung Fu!!!!!

If only I could spend about 5 years just training in kung fu....Oh wait, I'm doing it! Dreams really do come true!

Winning and Losing

My requirements are really all over the place right now. The Tiger Challenge went really well and I'm very happy with my performance overall. I failed at acheiving my goal though which was to place in the top 50% in each division. So now I'm in a weird state of mind. I succeeded and failed at the same time. These goals that I've set are definitely challenging, especially since I've decided to go back to China in August. There are days where I get overwhelmed and discouraged and other days where I'm on top of the world. I've also failed at meditating 15 minutes every single day. I've missed a lot of days but yet I keep going, keep trying. I've usually don't commit myself to such lofty goals but I'm so glad that I have because it's completely changed the way I see my world. Despite that fact that I know I won't succeed at everything I've chosen to do, I'm still making progress in leaps and bounds. I've changed the way I live my life and I make kung fu one of my top priorities. I always have a reason to train so I always find the time.

Even though I haven't achieved some of my goals, I'm really happy. I wish that I'd always known what I know now about success. It's about the journey, not the destination. If you don't try, you'll never succeed. And my new personal favorite: It's not whether you win or lose, it's how you play the game. These are all things that people say (and hear) all the time but I never really understood until now. I hope I can pass on what I've learned to other people so that they can feel what it's like to give it your all and not hold anything back.

It may seem like I've failed at certain things but I feel like a winner. I know now that to do your absolute best is to win, no matter what the end result is. The only way you can lose is by not trying.

thanks

I read this really awesome quote once that I wanted to put in this post. I can't find it in my book now though so I'll do my best to paraphrase. Basically, it said that once you make a solid commitment to something in your mind, things start to fall into place. Doors open and opportunities present themselves. It is not enough to say it and yet have doubts inside. You have to be 100% committed. I've experienced this a lot with kung fu. I am constantly discovering new levels of commitment that at one time I would have thought impossible and each time I do, I receive all the tools that I need. Almost magically, it is made easier and more simple than it would have been if I'd been holding back.

Well that's the gist of it. If I manage to find the quote I'll include it later. It's much more eloquent than I am.

On a side note the tournament was today and everything went really well. I performed to my very best and I'm pleased with my success. I managed to scrape up a trophy for grand champion which is proof that lots of hard work really does pay off. Thanks to everyone who supported me. I'd write more but I'm on cloud nine right now and I really just want to sit outside and enjoy the sunset.

Training at a higher level

This cold weather is making it a bit tricky to train outside. I can bundle up but when the grass is all wet, it gets a bit slippery. I've been practicing the sword form that I've made for our tournament a lot. There's one move in particular that I've had to work on over and over again. I do a flying spinning crescent kick and then I have to land and continue to spin, spiraling myself down into a tiny open X stance and extending my sword arm out to the side, almost touching the ground with the tip. It's pretty hard to balance when doing the spin at the end. For a while I always had to put my hand down to keep from falling on my butt. Well I've been practicing it like crazy and experimenting with different footwear and I've managed to get it down. It's a really cool move and I can't wait to pull it off in the tournament.

I participated in a demo at the tri-leisure centre on saturday. It went really well, everyone did a great job. I'm really glad that I agreed to it because I think it was great practice for the tournament. I wanted to see how nervous I would get and if it would mess me up. I did alright, making only one tiny mistake, and I managed to stay calm enough to actually enjoy myself. Now I'm looking forward to the tournament again. Not just to getting it over with, but also just because I think it'll be a lot of fun.

UBBT stuff is going ok. I'm falling behind on sparring again but after the tournament, I'll have more time to spend on it so I should be able to catch up. BJJ is going well. I'm getting in about 3 or 4 hours a week now so I'm making progress. My teacher is actually really good. He's straightforward and practical, qualities that I appreciate, and he treats me the same as any of the guys. It was a bit intimidating to train as one of only 2 women in my class but now I'm feeling a lot more comfortable there.

Master Brinker was talking about commitment in the brown belt class last night and it really made me think. He was talking about making kung fu a priority and having to sacrifice certain things to do that. I started thinking about the things that I've sacrificed and will continue to sacrifice. Then I started thinking about all the black belts in our school and how many sacrifices we've all made collectively. I bet it's a lot. Then I went even bigger and thought about everyone in the world who's ever made sacrifices to practice kung fu. I'm sure that some people have even sacrificed their lives. Looking at it that way certainly makes me realize how easy I've got it. So I don't get to see my friends and family as much as I'd like, I still have the freedom to train as much as I want.

Next week I'll post a bit more about commitment.